Day 1

Had some successes and fails. And a lot of reflection on my fears and on what is making me want to emotionally eat. I will start with the successes

- I did awesome in the morning. Fiber rich oatmeal and canadian bacon the total on stats was

calories: 220 fat: 3.5 Carbs 35 and sugar 7 and it was filling.

- I kept telling myself no to a flavored coffee from starbucks or McD;s... just say no to mochas and frappes needs to be my motto. I just kept thinking of the number on the scale and it made it easier to say no.

- I still did a late night snack BUT it was healthy with PB and an apple. So I am marking as a success :D

Fails (and these are only to claim them not to beat myself up with them!)

-My first mid snack was decent with a luna bar but I had a banana and both together was too filling. and not sure the calorie intake as my hubby and I decided to road trip unexpectantly and it got me all off kilter. I will have to plan better for any situation I think.

- Had mexican for lunch from a restratraunt and could have made a better food choice. It was good though so that is something :D lol

- I had a late snack. I put this on the list as I want to get away from eating late. But it just seems in front of the tv or even reading a book my head tells my stomach it is hungry. And I sit and say no then the hunger begins to feel real. I really need to figure this out it has to be psychological!

- The number on the scale was an epic fail. I am hoping some of it was women's bloating but still to get that high is more then bloat alone. It is so sucky I don't even want to say it. But I should just to dispell and claim it (I think claim it is my new motto here lol) it read 202. I haven't weight that much in a year. I worked so hard to have a number under 200 that I almost killed myself (I spent a week in ICU after my original GBP surgery went wrong it was crazy and a long story for another day) and am not exaggerating. So again EPIC FAIL! bluck

I do have some crazy stress going on (not ot make huge excuses but the truth) I am about to run out of unemployment benefits and I am to start a new job BUT it is taking awhile to get vetted (it is a state job and you have to have a lot of crediantial for it. IE so many credits of certain college classes, references etc) I am hoping to start next week but haven't gotten a formal you are hired letter so I am starting to panic and being an emotional eater that is not good for me and wanting lose weight. :(

I am doing some researching and trying to find the right mix for me. I want to follow a plan but I want to be able to be spontaneous too (like yesterday) but I don't want to use that excuse to make poor choices. I am hoping these two books will help. (I will try and upload an image later see rant below :D) Both by Geenen Roth "WHen Food is Love" and "Women food and God" I hope to get a lot of info from this book on how to overcome my food addiction. Which I know I firmly have.

Also I have gleemed a ton of information from a blog I stumbled upon from another favorite blog of mine. You can find it at http://mealsandmoves.wordpress.com/ and she is currently giving away some coupons for a drink I have no idea it is about but it seems super good for you. I wouldn't know where to find it in my small town but if I get a coupon I will hunt for it. So wish me luck. :D And check her out. She is doing this Fit for Life plan and it seems practical and something I am planning on incorporating into my eating lifestyle (the new name instead of diet.. you like? :D )

Sorry couldn't upload images stupid blogger! GRRR !